Well a saddening tragedy has just been committed today. Forget Anne Frank, and forget Obama because Never Shout Never has been voted by the AP readers for their Artist of the year. All I can wonder is, WHAT THE HELL happened to our scene? Never Shout Never? What has Christopher Drew actually accomplished in people’s minds to earn this? It’s very likely that AP was flooeded with Tween girls who are enamored with our own scene’s horrendous version of Justin Bieber. In fact, I honestly don’t know what exactly makes him apart of our scene with the exception of his haircut.
In case you haven’t gotten the full impact of it, we have voted NVN as artist of the year. Lets look at what our groundbreaking ,brilliant, and high pitched friend has actually accomplished through his various yelps and squeals that some how act as a pheromone for vulnerable tweens who respond to his shrieks with shrieks, yelps, and squeals of their own:
– Being a complete jerk to his fans. You’d better not get him anything made with plastic, because he WILL throw it back in your face. Instead of a “Thank you”, you’ll be the shocked recipient of a sudden hippie rage rant consisting of why you are a pox upon the environment, the earth, and all of man-kind. True story. Many other people will tell you stories of just how much of a dirtbag he is, so don’t be fulled by his hippie loving green crap.
– I was unfortunate enough to see part of NVN set while waiting for Sum 41 during Warped Tour 2010. Not only are his live performances mediocre at best, (Many people will confirm this), but the loud shrieks of clinically insane sounding 13 year old girls will shatter your eardrums as Christopher Drew shouts out in his remarkably feminine voice “Everyone kiss somebody!” I can only remember the stunned look on my face and the other sane audience members left who equally as shocked by the cheesiness we has just been subjected to.
– If two bland 20 minute albums filled with stale songs that all sound alike counts as musical genius and artist of the year “worthiness”, I’ve lost hope.
– How does lyrics of peace, love, and cheating distinguish him from the rest of the pop lyric tidal wave that exists in the mainstream? He can try to be the new John Lennon, but being an ungrateful snob who does nothing but smoke tons of weed all day just communicates his hypocrisy to anyone who isn’t below the age of 14, fancies creepy emo haircuts, and appreciates REAL music.
For those of you who know me, I love catchy music. I like Britney, because she is catchy. I like, Attack Attack, the Backstreet Boys, and No Doubt because they are catchy. They aren’t really musically talented per-say, full of originality, and filled with brilliant music composition, but at least they are nothing like NVN who isn’t catchy in the slightest bit!
There were so many better bands who had produced some incredible albums this year, but somehow, someway, people (a.k.a. 14 year old girls) voted NVN for the AltPress Artist of the Year. God help us.
By the way in case you are wondering, I’m working on the article about the 20 Bands of Christmas still. I’m trying to make it as epic as possible.